McAlister Institute
1400 N Johnson, Ste 101
El Cajon, CA 92020
619-442-0277

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I first decided to come to McAlister Institute in October 2000. My life had become a nightmare and it felt like there was no way out. No matter how hard I thought I was trying to make things better, they continued to sprial downward. On October 1, 2000 I began my journey by attending outpatient Detox. After 4 days of that I knew that I needed something more intense and was able to get into East County Detox. I completed my 14 days there and a bed had opened up at KIVA and transitioned right into there. After 5 1/2 months I had completed all my requirements and was ready to take another step into my journey. I then went to the Luke Lane Sober Living house and remained there for 9 months before I moved into my own home. For the first time in years I felt human again. I felt like I had finally accomplished the goal that I had set out to do. I did it, nobody did it for me. It took a lot of hard work and determination but I had the foundation that I needed. I had used drugs and alcohol for 26 years. In the beginning it was a big party. Before I knew it the party had now become a necessity. I could not function and deal with everyday life unless I was high. All the beauty and color was now black or white. I was no longer the mother that my children deserved. Somehow I managed to keep them in my custody. The one thing that made me think that I was not an addict was I did not shoot dope. I was not like them. In the end I had become the "junkie" that I had promised I would never become. It was early one morning and I had woken up and was thinking about that next issue when I looked into the mirror and it wasn't me that I was looking at. It was that "junkie", sucked up with dark circles under my eyes. It was then that I knew I needed to do something different. I had no clue what it was but I knew I had to do it right then and there or I may not have had another chance or the courage to just walk away.

I took what little belongings I had and threw them into a trash bag and ran. I litterly ran to a payphone and called someone who I knew would get me somewhere safe. By the next day I was at McAlister Institute. Within 1 week of completing KIVA I began working for McAlister Institute at the Z Cafe. I knew from the time that I was in Detox that I wanted to work in the field of recovery. Starting at the cafe was a way to get my foot in the door. I worked there for close to 2 years and in the meantime I began to attend CAARR classes. Before I had graduated from CAARR I was working as a part time "shift worker" at East County Detox.

I had found my calling. I soon began doing shift work for East and North County Detox, New Connections, and KIVA. I asked questions and learned everything that I could. By December 2004 I had won Employee of the Year. Me...that junkie...Employee of the Year. What an Honor! Today I work as a program Manager at East County Detox, where it all began. I am very proud of myself. As long as I remain humble and teachable, any goal that I have set for myself I am able to accomplish. The thing that I am most proud of is my title as grandma ! Jeanne and I have that in common). I got clean 15 days before my oldest grandchild was born. I now have 6 grandchildren. What a blessing. I still get emotional knowing that I can't change the way I raised my own children. I can sure as heck make up for it with the grandmother that I am today! In my early recovery I had to step up to the plate and raise my oldest grandchild for a couple of years and I am now doing having to do with one of my younger grandchildren. What an "privileg" if it were not for McAlister Institute I would not have been able to do this.

Thank You Jeanne McAlister. Without you and the programs you have I would not be the person that I am today. Thank you for believing in me and allowing me to be a part of such an awesome orginization. It began at McAlister Institute and here I will remain as long as they allow me to. I owe you my life.
 
Date of Posting: 15 July 2011
Posted By: Alma Cotta
Graduate of McAlister

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